El Paso

I am en route to El Paso. That’s right, El Paso, Texas, the border town to Ciudad Juarez the latter of which is the home of many many murders and a very disturbing trend of dead ladies in shallow graves (or completely untraceable graves.) Looks like a fun week of exploring the Embassy Suites is surely ahead. (later update) The hotel guide said that no trip to El Paso would be complete without a trip to Juarez, but my group of 25 trainees all emphatically stressed that I should not go there and that, in so many words, it could complete all my trips ever in life by resulting in death. So don't trust that El Paso Embassy Suites travel guide, is the short summary. You will however, notice that the golden lights of Juarez are particularly beautiful seen from above on the hills of El paso. Also, re: the Embassy Suites, it was a totally decent hotel, not totally top of the line as far as decor, but has a great high ceilinged atrium where you can watch whatever sporting event is on, and free cocktails from like 530-730 pm!

My flight was delayed but rarely do I find myself in so sunny a mood. Maybe it's the 3 days of exercise last week or the ridiculous amount of space in my seat right now despite being in coach on a completely full flight. By the way, I need to note which aircraft United is using to fly from Denver to San Diego because it is definitely roomier than their typical craft.) I was also pleasantly surprised that despite San Diego being a complete cluster-f of a fog delay, the United staff took a page from Southwest and were actually being jokey and lighthearted versus their usual humorless menopausal vibe.

Does anyone know if seltzer water is as good for you as non-carbonated water? I do prefer it so and I always get that with a lime when flying.

The El Paso airport is surprisingly nice and has a few Mexican restaurants (Carlos and Mickeys is apparently locally famous? My trainees recommended it, but I had already gone to Moe's whcih is also locally famous and suuupper delicious. if you like green chiles the green enchiladas covered with piles of green chiles will be a real delight) and a Starbucks. You don't need to stay out past security to eat at Carlos and Mickeys or get coffee at Starbucks--they have both those and a Pizza Hut after you go through security to the gate area.

My father told me that upon disembarking in El Paso I may want to start crying because it is such a dump of a city. Luckily, past experiences in BFE Louisiana alligator country (aka Marksville) have strengthened me for such a prospect. And actually (updating a few days later) this turns out to not have been the case. I decided to attempt to not mentally check out and just sit in my undies watching football and playing Facebook Scrabble all week, so I looked up some touristy things to do and I actually went out and did them. One night I went on something called the Mission trail and found a bunch of fantastic old churches, one of which is the oldest continually used church in America, The Ysleta Mission(top)—dating back from like 1642. The others, Socorro (middle) and Elizario (bottom) had wonderful architecture. The churches were linked by small towns that might as well just be in the neighboring state of Chihuahua, Mexico. Except marginally safer, I assume. There is an unabashed love of bright jewel toned paints that would be banned by any suburban America HOA and that’s the trail that wends between the missions.








On my way back from the missions I got caught in one of the craziest storms I could ever have imagined. First I came to a stoplight and I thought it was really foggy and then I realized that it was actually sand being blown in such a fury that it made everything in the distance look foggy. The wind was blowing things all over—I found out that two of the public housing developments at the agency I was working with lost their roofs that night! Anyway, then after the windsandstorm, I got caught in a lightning and rain storm that was epically beautiful and hard to drive in. We never get good lightning in San Diego and so I was just on the road watching huge bolts light up the whole sky. It was so beautiful I started applauding in my car. Because I am that person. Sarcastic as hell peppered with childlike wonderment.

Anyway, I also went in search of a famed local establishment called Chico’s Tacos whose tacos are totally weird, and yet completely addictive. They are basically taquitos with piles of cheese, but then you pour this hot, watery, mild salsa on the tacos and it melts the cheese and, I don't know, suddenly elevates to greatness. There are only like 4 Chico's Tacos in El Paso with a very basic menu of tacos, hot dogs, hamburgers and fried. A set of 6 taquitos is 3.86. Highly worthwhile.

Apparently driving 80 miles to see the White Sands National Monument in New Mexico would also be worthwhile, but um, it's closed at night and no you CAN'T see the dunes in the dark. So you should only do this during the day. That may seem obvious to people who have common sense or approach life with a plan, and that is basically not me. Nor is it obvious to a certain dopey Missile Range security guard who urged me to keep going 30 miles to the dunes in the pitch black because "ma'am, they are white, like the lines on the road." yeah, well, even if they are you can't see them from the highway!